• Home
• About
• Advertising
• Contact
• Print Subscriptions
• Donate
• Archives
• Links

Place Your Bets

By David Evans.

That old Bernanke magic may be delayed by market forces. No, not the traveling medicine show’s description of panacea, but the actual decisions of real people seeing their retirements being delayed. If you are twenty-five and you choose to ride the roller coaster, keep your day job. If you are fifty-five and beginning to consider semi-retirement or travel based on your annual report, keep your day job. If you are sixty-five and have already marked your 2009 calendar with big plans, keep your day job.

If you are Palin McCain, keep your day job. If you are Steve Pearce, keep your… oops. If you are John Cornyn, go ahead and update your resume. It can’t hurt. If you are Marilyn Musgrove, there is a resume service pretty close to your office. Walk around on your lunch break. You will see it.

If you are Al Franken, your finishing kick will get you gold. If you are Jeanne Shaheen, use mail instead of landlines. If you are Mark Begich, testify for the defense until November first. If your name is Udall, congratulations. If you are Jared Polis, welcome to the NFL, kid. Your primary win still surprises me.

Of every part of the Dow eight days ago, two out of nine have vanished. They have evaporated. The total of the betting slips is off 22.1 percent in eight trading days. Place your bets. No short selling, please! Place your bets.

Early voting is underway and people are enthusiastic about the possibility of meaningful change. McCain is wearing the Eisenhower coat in reliably red states and even Kentucky, Georgia, Mississippi, and North Carolina are changing the motif in their Senate offices to a soothing clear morning sky theme.

The finance ministers have clucked their cluck and seen the capital at a distance. They may speak to the Russians soon.

Did you put oil futures in the stocking this year? The drill, drill, drill crowd is quieting. The caribou may migrate one more year. The sport fishermen and women may see one more season of marlin. The oil shale may stay in the lab. Boone Pickens may not need a bailout for his current wind.

Gas will be three dollars. Only another buck and a half to go. ACORN is being smeared for their effectiveness. The pattern is reminiscent of an ’86 Austin consultant who broke into his own office. The Chicago firm of Plouffe and Axelrod is investigating. Hot Tip: Look at Zorro, the markings are familiar.

It is “argue about our history weekend.” America was not discovered, it was invaded, says one side. The occupation is neverending. “… sailed the ocean blue, in fourteen hundred ninety two,” says the other. Perhaps we can agree that the myth of Columbus “invented” America. Play nice at your local casino.

Place your bets.

Comments